Choose Resilience Choose Y O U
Like many others before me it stopped me in my tracks as if someone had reached right through this same hole in me. The profoundness of it has been a beacon of sorts for me some years later, Looking to, at a minimum, help others wear a special “shirt” that covers the hole. There is nothing like this agony, there is little support for grief of a loved one who is gone “to you” but still living, worse yet, chooses to not have Y O U any longer. Few understand it because there is no metric for it. Estrangement is relatively new in our culture in its current form full of boundaries, and rules and silence. the deafening of the silence right? Few know what to do or say or how to support you because there is no body, there is no reason to provide endless casseroles, calls for coffee/tea or tears. And yet, you are alone .
So you’re probably wondering what’s the point then? Do I light a candle of hope? Do I spend days if not years ruminating about what I did or didn’t do? Do I practice Radial Acceptance because surely that’s the answer? Do I write the dreaded Amends Letter? I think there is some value in accepting where you are, (albeit perhaps alongside the curb), but there is MORE beyond this radical acceptance.
If your mindset is such that you think the curb is where you belong and you’re happy there today then hope has little place for you. B U T if you know your current mindset isn’t where you want to be, there’s plenty to do about it!
What is Mindset? Mindset is everything. Mindset is the notion that you are who you think you are, even if you think you aren’t. Read that one again. Mindset is your beliefs about yourself and your values. This is how Y O U make sense of your world and your place in it. It is essentially your Superpower. Don’t waste it. To learn more about your mindset and how to shift it, please reach out.